So being in a world where simple as a female, I'm viewed as second class then on top of that you add foreigner, then mix the two together and try and get people to change and do things a different way is very challenging. I knew life in India would not be easy but one can never be fully prepared. When I left Boston, I told everyone that I've read lots of books, spoke with lots of people and was ready to tackle India. Well, now that I've been here for almost 4 months, I daily ask myself, "why stay? why should I put such stress on myself when this is not even my country?" I honestly don't have an answer!
Okay, so I have many Indian friends that live in Boston and India are for the most part, are NOTHING like the Indians I'm describing. So please don't get angry with me. I'm staying in a very remote village about 2 hours from Delhi. The school does not have proper electricity and 97% of the staff/teachers had never left UP (the state the school in located in) until me... Keep in mind, Delhi is in another state. So I'm working so closely with people whom have ZERO knowledge of the outside world. Trying to get them to understand basic hygiene is tough. Wash your hands after going to the toilet! Wash your hands before and after eating! Wash your hands with SOAP! I've been trying, rather Unsuccessfully to get the teachers to understand that beating a child does not teach them right from wrong. Case in point- a hostel student (whom happened to be the principles kid) skipped school. I caught him one hour after school had started, he told me he was eating breakfast and then was going. Okay, sometimes food is late. No problem. 9:30 I saw him. He said he was finishing his breakfast. I saw him again at 12noon. I then called his father/principle and asked his whereabouts. As a father he was angry, as principle, he told me to beat him and punish him as I felt suited. I don't hit, and I made that VERY CLEAR!! So as a punishment, I grounded this kid to his room from the time school ends until dinner (6:00pm) for the rest of the week... Day 1, fine. Day 2 not so fine.... I sent this kid back to his room and reminded him that if he does not follow the punishment because he skipped school that he should not be a student at this school and I have every right to kick him out... This kid (in the 6th class, aged 12) threw himself on the ground, wrapped his arms around is father/principle and whined and cried because he wanted to play Cricket. I reminded his father that this was his time to be the role of principle... He began to whine as much as his kid and then picked him up asking me just to beat him and be done with it. Well about 10 minutes later with me repeating "Hitting a child does not teach them anything... It just shows them that you're bigger and stronger than them." and that my punishment sticks. I reminded him that his children receive free education because he teaches here and that I have no problem releasing his child if he does not follow the rules of the school. He then threatens to quite and take both of his children... "No problem. This school is not a jail, you're free to go. You make up your own decisions. However, as long as this child is a student and a hostel child at this school, what I say goes! Final!" It's amazing how professional and calm I was. But inside I was so angry... This man!!! He has tried before to undermine what I've said because I'm a female.. Sorry buddy..... This female is one STRONG headed American that has never and will never allow any man to push her around.... Just not going to happen.. Needless to say, I got a very serious migraine that actually effected my vision. I was thinking that my eye disease had gotten worse and moved to the other eye. I even called my doctor at Tufts in Boston to see if she knew a doctor in Delhi. Well, it took more than 24 hours to get rid of my migraine and then slowly (within a few hours) my right eye returned to its previous state. That was scary though.. So what I've learned from this is not to let stupid people/men/teachers get me so worked up!!!! Just state my rule and let it be.
Breathe and calm down... This is after all, India.. For the record, he is still at the school as well as his children and for the remainder of the week, his child stayed in the room and did not leave even ONCE!
So I still don't have a real reason why I stay at the school, why I work so hard and I sure don't have a reason as to why I've agreed to attempt to change my visa over to a NGO/work visa and stay a few more months.... Perhaps I'm slightly crazy!!
Okay, so I have many Indian friends that live in Boston and India are for the most part, are NOTHING like the Indians I'm describing. So please don't get angry with me. I'm staying in a very remote village about 2 hours from Delhi. The school does not have proper electricity and 97% of the staff/teachers had never left UP (the state the school in located in) until me... Keep in mind, Delhi is in another state. So I'm working so closely with people whom have ZERO knowledge of the outside world. Trying to get them to understand basic hygiene is tough. Wash your hands after going to the toilet! Wash your hands before and after eating! Wash your hands with SOAP! I've been trying, rather Unsuccessfully to get the teachers to understand that beating a child does not teach them right from wrong. Case in point- a hostel student (whom happened to be the principles kid) skipped school. I caught him one hour after school had started, he told me he was eating breakfast and then was going. Okay, sometimes food is late. No problem. 9:30 I saw him. He said he was finishing his breakfast. I saw him again at 12noon. I then called his father/principle and asked his whereabouts. As a father he was angry, as principle, he told me to beat him and punish him as I felt suited. I don't hit, and I made that VERY CLEAR!! So as a punishment, I grounded this kid to his room from the time school ends until dinner (6:00pm) for the rest of the week... Day 1, fine. Day 2 not so fine.... I sent this kid back to his room and reminded him that if he does not follow the punishment because he skipped school that he should not be a student at this school and I have every right to kick him out... This kid (in the 6th class, aged 12) threw himself on the ground, wrapped his arms around is father/principle and whined and cried because he wanted to play Cricket. I reminded his father that this was his time to be the role of principle... He began to whine as much as his kid and then picked him up asking me just to beat him and be done with it. Well about 10 minutes later with me repeating "Hitting a child does not teach them anything... It just shows them that you're bigger and stronger than them." and that my punishment sticks. I reminded him that his children receive free education because he teaches here and that I have no problem releasing his child if he does not follow the rules of the school. He then threatens to quite and take both of his children... "No problem. This school is not a jail, you're free to go. You make up your own decisions. However, as long as this child is a student and a hostel child at this school, what I say goes! Final!" It's amazing how professional and calm I was. But inside I was so angry... This man!!! He has tried before to undermine what I've said because I'm a female.. Sorry buddy..... This female is one STRONG headed American that has never and will never allow any man to push her around.... Just not going to happen.. Needless to say, I got a very serious migraine that actually effected my vision. I was thinking that my eye disease had gotten worse and moved to the other eye. I even called my doctor at Tufts in Boston to see if she knew a doctor in Delhi. Well, it took more than 24 hours to get rid of my migraine and then slowly (within a few hours) my right eye returned to its previous state. That was scary though.. So what I've learned from this is not to let stupid people/men/teachers get me so worked up!!!! Just state my rule and let it be.
Breathe and calm down... This is after all, India.. For the record, he is still at the school as well as his children and for the remainder of the week, his child stayed in the room and did not leave even ONCE!
So I still don't have a real reason why I stay at the school, why I work so hard and I sure don't have a reason as to why I've agreed to attempt to change my visa over to a NGO/work visa and stay a few more months.... Perhaps I'm slightly crazy!!
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